Choosing the right bridesmaids is an extremely important decision and never more so than when holding an overseas wedding as there are usually even more things to organise than a wedding in the UK. You might for instance, want your bridesmaids to assist in organising activities for the day before or after the wedding.
But how do you go about picking the bridesmaids to stand along side you in your wedding party?
Consider these factors before making your decision:
- Sometimes tradition isn’t always the right way to go – whilst it’s popular to choose your sisters or sisters-in-law as bridesmaids, lots of brides find that they’re far closer to their friends. If this is the case with you, then don’t be guilted into choosing family members as your bridesmaids. When it comes to the morning of your wedding, you’ll want a proper support network of people around you to cope with your jittery moments and to stand beside you sharing your joy. You will not want to be accompanied down the aisle by people you’re not that close to, just to appease the more traditional and stuffy members of your family.
- It can be difficult to decide how many bridesmaids to have. If you want to have 8 bridesmaids and can afford to have them in your wedding, then by all means go ahead and ask them. However, make sure that you’ve sat down and actually thought about the logistics of having 8 emotional, giggly (and possibly tipsy!) bridesmaids around you on the morning of your wedding. It might make you feel very overwhelmed. Equally, be careful when deciding to only have 1 bridesmaid. If you go down this route, then you’re going to be putting a lot of pressure on this one person. Be sure that they’re up to the task of being able to look after you on your wedding day.
- Finances can be a large factor in choosing who and how many bridesmaids to have. Traditionally it is the bride (or brides family) that pays for the bridesmaids wedding dresses, shoes, flowers, hair and makeup. Nowadays of course, this expectation has been relaxed and many bridesmaids may be very happy to pay for their own dress, particularly as they’ll get to keep it and possibly wear it again. But you’ll need to assess the situation based on your own understanding of your own finances and your potential bridesmaids’ finances.
- Bridesmaiding (we made up that word) doesn’t just take place on the wedding day. From the moment you get engaged, you’ll need your bridesmaids for activities like hen dos, hair trials, dress shopping and for sending endless amounts of emails to about table settings and bouquets (all the stuff the grooms hate). Make sure that you choose bridesmaids who will be with you throughout your entire wedding journey and aren’t just interested in wearing a pretty dress and appearing in all your photos.
- You don’t necessarily need to return any favours. Although it can feel quite pressurising, even if you have been a bridesmaid for someone else, it doesn’t necessarily mean that you have to choose that person to be amongst your line-up. However, if you’ve made the decision not to include them and are still on good terms, then you should probably speak to the person and give them your reasons.
- If you feel like you have too many people that are ‘bridesmaids material’, but that you aren’t able to fit all of them into your line-up, then think carefully about special wedding tasks that they might be able to do, so that you’re still able to make them an integral part of your special day. Ideas include getting someone to do a reading, arrange your flowers, design your wedding invitations, or to sing or play an instrument during the service.
So, there’s a lot to think about when deciding how to choose your bridesmaids – take your time making the decision to ensure that you get the best support network of people around you.
